I know
Within my mind
I'm not responsible
For the abuse/bullying
I have experienced.
And yet
There's a part
That does.
Being pulled
In so many
Different directions
I don't understand.
As various layers
of guilt
Built up
Around my soul
Is slowly
Stripped away.
Holding back
The tears
In my ducts
Can't help
But think
How things
Could've been different.
If I was born
Cisgender
Instead of trans.
A question
I'll never have
An answer for.
Therisa © 2017
Author's note: Sigh. For the past month, or so, I have been dealing, with a renewal bout of my depression. In that, I have been isolating myself, to the point of becoming agoraphobic, again. In real life, and on the Internet, Struggling, in finding ways, to express this darkening of my soul, in a positive way, that would prevent me, from falling into the trap of self-pitying myself. Having done enough of that, over the years.
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